The Advice Girls in their Twenties Need

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Whether you relate to one of these or all, we’re all human and flaws are a part of the package. I’ve done a little soul searching within myself, took a few hiatuses, and got a better hold on myself and started loving myself again and figured a few things out surrounding me. Friendships aren’t meant to be perfect and neither are relationships or family, but they do make life a little less hard and a little more fulfilling. So to the girls still trying to figure themselves out in their 20s with their relationships or friendships, take this advice whether it go in one ear and out the other. At least think about it:

1. Age is but a number

You’re never too old at this stage. Period. If you’re alive, you’re age appropriate to make the most of your time with the ones who matter. Take advantage of each chance you get to let loose (not too loose now. Keep it together sometimes,) have fun, and spend time with the people you care about.

2. Talk to each other

Talk TO each other instead of talking ABOUT each other. You get nowhere with gossip and that only increases a chance of misunderstanding. You can’t expect to get the whole story or begin to understand someone without being direct.

3. Make time for your friends

Make time with your friends not because you have to, but because you want to. Time with your friends is good for the soul, and as cliche as that sounds, it’s completely true. You unlock the freedom to act without the fear of judgement.

4. Friendships go beyond relationships

Your friends are there before, during, and after your relationships with boyfriends, girlfriends, fiancés, marriages, same-sex partners, purely sex partners, whatever it is for you. Treat them as such.

5. Be honest with the people who love you

when life gets tough, it’s temporary. Don’t trick yourself into keeping it a secret from the world, thinking it’ll make it seem less real than it already is. Being honest with your friends, especially about things you may not want to deal with, is that much more important than keeping it to yourself. You have to share things because they’ll support you through to the other side.

6. Put the damn phone down!

Get off your damn phone. The people who matter most are right in front of you. How about you immerse yourself into a reality you can touch instead of watching shit.

7. Get over your shit!

Get over your shit, so that you don’t end up taking it out on your friends or your loved ones. They don’t deserve to be your punching bag and you should know that whether you mean it or not, you can’t take back anything you say or do and if you continue to just say sorry, the shit will get old and no one will hear you anymore.

8. Sometimes fighting is the only way through

No one wants to argue with their friends or loved ones, but sometimes it’s the only way to lay everything on the table and move forward. If you’re going to fight, make sure it’s worth it. It’s your time to be completely forthcoming and if you’re fighting over something petty and irrational, be prepared for a war.

9. Nothing good comes from saying “Can I just say something…”

Don’t talk about your friends to other friends, it always comes out on the other end. If something is bothering you about a friend, you need to face that head on. You would want the same in return. It’s the time to be mature. The same goes for relationships.

10. Friendship is family

Blood is not the only connector of family. You may not get to choose all of your family, but you do have the power to choose some.

11. Sometimes your friends know best

Your friends know you inside and out, without wanting anything in return. They love you for you, and in wanting the best for you, they can sometimes see the best. Make choices for yourself but take their input into consideration. Now if they’re just being negative nancies and do nothing but complain, tune they ass out. The only thing a true friend hopes for in return is to see you smile.

12. Life is too short to wait for anything

Don’t postpone anything, the time to share is the time you have. The only moments that are certain are right now.

13. Brutal honesty IS honest

I know it’s hard to be okay with it, but don’t ever be offended with honesty, no matter the extreme. It comes from a place of love.

Sade